Kinky Books to Learn about Fetish

If you love to read and you’re kinky at the same time, your first instinct is going to be reading about the subject. That’s a great idea, but you never really know if the information you’re getting is any good. It’s not like you need a degree in fetish to get a book deal. Anyone can write about it and anyone can tell you anything they want. If you want a good list of books that you can rely on for good information then all you have to do is scroll down. These are the best books to learn about kink and fetish.

BDSM Basics for Beginners by Michelle Fegatofi

If you’re longing for a straightforward guidebook to teach you the ins and outs of BDSM, look no further. BDSM Basics for Beginners by Michelle Fegatofi is the end-all be-all starting point for someone who wants to get a better idea of the lifestyle, as well as learn things like terms, guidelines, different types of relationships, and the roles different dynamics play. If you have any experience, this book is probably too novice, but if you’re trying to find an all-encompassing starting point, you can’t go wrong with Fegatofi’s guide. Considering she has over 20 years of experience as a submissive, you’ll be in good hands.

The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton

When the first editions of the Topping Book and the Bottoming Book hit the shelves in the early 90s, readers were enthralled by the candor, kindness, and detail Hardy and Easton went into to describe what it’s like (and what to consider) to be in a BDSM relationship. Part guidebooks, part anecdotal reads, the “new” editions delve deeper into both sides of the spectrum, giving readers a source for questions and comfort. Many reviewers agree: Whether you’re a top or a bottom, these books are the place to start if you’re considering entering (or are curious about) BDSM relationships.

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Philip Miller and Molly Devon

If you learn better with visuals and need a little hand-holding along the way, you’re in luck: Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns has it all—photos, drawings, a glossary of terms, and even an index with a comprehensive list of BDSM clubs and stores. The humor interjected throughout makes the whole notion of diving into a BDSM dynamic a little less daunting, and you’ll even find yourself chuckling as you get in-depth knowledge about crucial components like negotiation, endorphins, and safety. Yes, all of the important info is there, but it reads more like a conversation you’d have over drinks and less like a stuffy college textbook you have to sift through.

Dom’s Guide to BDSM by Matthew Larocco

For dominants or those who dream of taking on a dominant role, this guide is for you. As one of the highest rated BDSM how-tos on Amazon, it’s clear Matthew Larocco knows what he’s talking about. As opposed to a broad book covering the basics, as the title suggests, this guide is specifically focused on a dom/dominatrix’s role. Not only does it highlight how to give and receive pleasure, but it’ll teach you how to reframe your thoughts, care for your sub, and ensure you become a safe, compassionate, and respectful master.

The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl’s Guide to Female Dominance by Mistress Lorelei

For dominate women looking to explore BDSM with their submissive partners, there’s no better place to start than The Mistress Manual. Written by a dominatrix herself, this guide helps remove any confusion you might experience while stepping into a new, more dominant role in your relationship. Filled with tips, facts, and suggestions geared toward female tops, Mistress Lorelei’s fun and destigmatizing manual has helped many become their best version of a dominatrix.

The Dominance Playbook: Ways to Play With Power in Scenes and Relationships by Anton Fulmen

If you already have the BDSM basics down and want to turn things up a notch, The Dominance Playbook is just what the master ordered. As the name suggests, this is for those who are looking for new scene ideas and power dynamics. With the help of this guide, Fulmen offers solid advice for “weaving power exchange into the fabric of a long term relationship.”

Get Reading!

So now you can finally get reading! The people on this list know what they’re talking about and you’re in very safe hands with the information they provide. They’re going to be your go to source for information for a long time to come. Make sure you read them and digest the information before you try to act it all out, though. There’s nothing worse than a kinkster with a little bit of information and no real world experience.

Take some Time

Take the time to really understand what you’re being told. It’s not just about the physical acts that they detail. It’s about the emotional effect it has on you and your partner. That’s what it really comes down to with everything. If you have a partner and there’s lots of mutual trust then you’re well-placed to start acting out your kinkiest desires right away. Just hold yourself back and make sure your partner is on board with it. It doesn’t need to be a totally mental practice, but taking it slowly is always going to work out for the best.

Don’t Forget to Share!

Pay special attention to the how to guides listed here. Those are going to be the nuts and bolts explanations that many of you are looking for. When you start trying them out for yourself, don’t be afraid to share your progress and experience! Simply send your pictures, videos, and stories to submissions@allaboutkinks.com! We’re always happy to share what you send with everyone else on the site so we can all talk about and learn together! That’s the best part of being in a kinky community and we’re ready to share whenever you are!